Why do they shut me out of Heaven?

On the spur of the moment I go to two concerts tonight - young artists playing contemporary music. First the Lendvai String Trio playing Segerstam, Skempton, Frances-Hoad and Penderecki. They changed the order of the programme so it was a little confusing hearing the Skempton in the context of the programme note about Cheryl Frances-Hoad's piece based on a Ted Hughes poem, but four very enjoyable pieces (especially the last three), played with enormous skill (apparent even to a non-musician like me). Then a concert of music for piano and saxophone (Fiona Asbury and Paul Cassidy playing Turnage, Carpenter and Fitkin) and cello and piano (Charles Watt and Nathan Williamson playing Williamson, Skempton, Benjamin Wallfisch and Britten). Some fascinating music: a magic moment in the Turnage when Asbury played the saxophone directly into the piano as the pianist pedalled, causing wonderful reverberations.

The programme covered the whole week-long series of concerts of which these were the last two. so I found myself reading the texts for a vocal recital earlier in the week. Some contrast:

Heart, we will forget him
You and I, tonight.
You may forget the warmth he gave,
I will forget the light.

When you have done, pray tell me,
That I my thoughts may dim;
Haste! lest while you're lagging
I may remember him!

Emily Dickinson

Last night I drove a car
not knowing how to drive
not owning a car
I drove and knocked down
people I loved
went 120 through one town.
I stopped at Hedgeville
and slept in the back seat
excited about my new life.

Gregory Corso

Why do they shut me out of Heaven
Did I sing too loud?
But I can say a little minor
Timid as a bird.
Wouldn't the Angels try me just once more
Just see if I troubled them
But don't shut the door, don't shut the door.
Oh, if I were the gentleman in the white robes
and they were the little hand that knocked,
Could I forbid, could I forbid, could I forbid?
Why do they shut me out of Heaven,
Did I sing too loud?

Emily Dickinson